Bye, Bye, Moses. It's Been...Interesting.

I finished reading Deuteronomy, and thus completes the last book of Moses. (Thus? I just wrote "thus." Thou may understandeth I read too mucheth scriptures).

Anyway, reading the last dozen chapters was much easier seeing it through the different perspective my father presented. I wasn't as frustrated and angry. I wish the world would see it differently, too, and not use the literal text of the OT as an excuse to be cruel to each other.

Speaking of being cruel to each other, I read an interesting article yesterday about a loving woman, Becky Douglas, who began Rising Star Outreach, a nonprofit organization dedicated to serving leprosy victims in India and their children, who live with them in the leprosy colonies (LDSLiving, May/June 2010, p. 20-21). Those with leprosy are treated as "untouchables" and shunned, "disowned by family members, and cast out of society because of the cultural stigma associated with the disease."

That caught my attention because the Old Testament {what I've read so far (or thus far)} talks about shunning people with leprosy and how it's used as a sign, a warning, or as a punishment from God. I just wonder how much of the ancient culture of different societies have been influenced by what Moses wrote.

Did you know that leprosy is a curable disease? I didn't know that. I figured societies had "leper colonies" because it wasn't curable. Anyway, Rising Star Outreach is an inspiring group. Here's their website: risingstaroutreach.org

I gave my Sunday school lesson today. It was about not forgetting God. When times are good, we tend to let our good spiritual habits slack. We don't read the scriptures as much nor pray as much. This makes it easier for negative influences to sway us. Prayer, attending church, Family Home Evening, gratitude, Word of Wisdom, and scripture reading are among many things we can do to protect ourselves.

Today is Mother's Day. I was given some blogging moments to myself. Time to trade in the computer for my kids and spend the rest of the day together.

:)

Moses? Moses Who?

This post is from my first guest blogger, my father. He didn't know he was going to be a guest blogger, but I liked his letter so much I asked if I could keep it here on my blog. (This is in response to my last post, click here).

Hi Gina. Dad here.

Okay if I share some reactions to your frustration with, particularly, the Old Testament? I've read the entire Bible a couple of times, the NT several times, and various portions of both OT and NT many, many times; and I generally dislike reading in the OT. A lot of it has to do with your reaction to the way God is portrayed and even moreso with how stupid the Israelites come across. That's especially if you take it at face value.

Many, many people share your horror at the murders and genocide that apparently was not only condoned, but ordered by God! A quick Google search reveals that. And many people come to your conclusion (or at least your preferred conclusion) that Moses was at fault, not God.

Lots of people question whether there was really such a person as Moses since there is really no extra-biblical proof that he did. But Moses was referred to many times in the New Testament, often even by Jesus himself. And of course, Moses appeared to Joseph Smith just a few decades ago. So, I suppose it's safe to assume he really existed.

Assuming that, what kind of guy was he? Apparently he had a speech impediment; certainly something that can make it difficult to be in public. He was born a slave, but raised as an Egyptian prince. That could certainly lead to a conflicted set of values. He murdered an Egyptian supervisor for abusing a Jewish slave and went into hiding. Not sure how it was that he was able to reappear and not have to face the murder charge. Anyway, he apparently had a temper; and as I say, the Israelites come across as really stupid people, which no doubt could cause Moses to lose it now and then.

So, why God chose Moses to lead the children of Israel out of Egypt, etc., I can only assume is God's way of showing that He can use an imperfect instrument to achieve His perfect plan. I guess we like to think that back then killing whole tribes of people (including women and children) was a common thing, and we've gotten over that. To think that means we have to ignore Rwanda and the K'mer Rouge and the Tutsis and Hutus, as well as the killing going on in Iraq and Afghanistan, etc.. Should I mention the countless acts of violence that go on on an individual basis throughout the world?

Just like now, I think all that violence back then was simply the way humans chose to deal with things they were faced with; although it's hard to understand when the Bible says that God told them to go in and kill all the inhabitants.

That's why I mentioned before that I view the Bible and especially the OT as allegorical in nature because even if it is a literal recitation of history (and perhaps especially so), it has the effect of driving people away from God rather than drawing them to Him. On the other hand, if those stories are to be of any value to present-day people, the lessons have to be applicable on a personal level in a positive way. So, I believe the story of the Israelites in slavery, Moses' leading them out of Egypt, wandering around in the desert, and eventualy entering the promised land, is all allegorical to the progression of the human soul.

Before a person becomes aware of the presence of God in his or her life, he/she exists in ignorance and slavery to sin (separation from God). Anyone or anything which leads the person out of that slavery is their Moses. In the process of learning to survive without the structure of slavery and enjoying the liberties and responsibilities of freedom, a person encounters many obstacles which must be faced and dealt with in faith and action. And even when one enters the "promised land" of a consistent relationship with God, there is further development to be had and dangers of slipping back into slavery. So, the ruthless slaughter of men, women, and children is an allegorical reference to the strictness and severity with which we must each deal with whatever it is in our nature which prevents us from having a complete relationship with God. Since God, to be God, must be pure in nature, He cannot coexist with impurity; just as light cannot coexist with darkness. One drives the other out. So, to the extent we have impurities within our nature, we cannot have a full and complete relationship with Him until we exterminate those impurities. (Emphases by Gina...good stuff!)

(Emphases added by Gina).

Now, I don't know that any of this is true; but it seems to fit better with Jesus' description of God as being Love than the vengeful, sadistic God portrayed in the OT.

Well, those are a few thoughts your reaction triggered.

Love you,

Dad

Moses vs God: Challenging My Testimony

The first five books of the Old Testament are written by Moses. I've read Genesis, Exodus, Leviticus, Numbers and part of Deuteronomy. It's been tough on my testimony.

Through the Abrahamic Covenant, God promises Abraham's seed a choice land flowing with milk and honey. First they spend hundreds of years in captivity in Egypt. Moses leads them out, and they journey towards the promised land. Through their journeys and acquisition of the land, they murder populations of other people at God's command (according to Moses).

For example, Numbers 31 - Israel (the name of Jacob's seed) camped near the Midianites. Some members committed "whoredoms" with some Midianite members. They committed adultery and worshiped false gods with them. This was excuse enough for Moses (through God's command) to have the Midianites destroyed. The men were destroyed, but the women and children were held captive. Moses became wroth with the army captains and told them to "kill every male among the little ones, and kill every woman that hath known man by lying with him. But all the women children, that have not known a man by lying with him, keep alive for yourselves," 31:17-18.

Genocide at it's best.

The first five books are littered with God commanding Moses to destroy this group and that group (and these are left out of the Sunday school lessons).

(Where to begin?)

One of the reasons I became an atheist in my early 20's was because I was tired of people using God as an excuse to hurt each other. I'm sick of it. I'm sick of terrorists bullying in the name of God. I'm sick of religions fighting each other and bickering in the name of God. I'm sick of people fighting over land in the name of God. I'm sick of my holier-than-thou uncles belittling family members in the name of God. I could scream. I considered that maybe God didn't even exist and was invented as a way to control and abuse each other and get power.

Here's the thing: I have a testimony that my Heavenly Father loves me, and he loves each of his children, even the ones who don't know him, or know him and hate him. He loves us all. The loving God I have been taught about is NOT the god Moses speaks of.

God is supposed to be the same today as yesterday and tomorrow. (Malachi 3:6, "For I am the Lord, I change not...").

I have a hard time believing God commanded all of that murder Moses writes about. Honestly, I have a hard time taking most of what he writes as literal. The best I can do right now is accept that there is something Heavenly Father wants me to learn from these scriptures.

Every ancient society from every continent has its own story of how they began (where the people came from, how the land was formed, the opposing forces of good and evil, gods/spirits/powers). Isn't it possible the people of Moses' time were no different? Moses had a lot of time on his hands and wrote some great stories of how it all started. "Once upon a time..."

If I'm going to hold on to what testimony I have left, then I have to believe there's a middle ground, meaning, it's not my "once upon a time," all made up scenario I just mentioned, and it's not exactly how Moses wrote it, either. I think he embellished some details and threw in some allegories. He was God's humble prophet that got a taste of power and used God as an excuse to do haenious crimes against humanity for gain. His stories were published and used for centuries to this day as an example for extremists to do the same, unfortunately.

There's a reason a lot of these scriptures are left out of Sunday school lessons. It's deplorable. Families are sacred. Children are gifts. Yet, Moses's god has no problem ripping them apart.

Silver lining...

How thankful I am for the gospel of Jesus Christ to bring light and hope and love and humanity to a dark, dark world of the Old Testament (what I've read so far). I'm sorry. Right now I just can't believe the Heavenly Father I pray to is the same Heavenly Father Moses speaks of. Moses misinterpreted God. Either something is wrong with God, or something was wrong with Moses. I choose to believe something was wrong with Moses. Prophets are people, too, with temptations and weaknesses (Balaam, for example) and also susceptible to eccentricities and poor mental health. For reasons I'm not educated in, yet, his books were chosen over others' to be included in the Bible.

I can't let this trip me up. I love the gospel. I love this church. My life is better for it. Dang it, Moses!

Joseph Sold Into Slavery

Believe it or not, I have been reading the Old Testament and am completely caught up with the lesson book outline. The lesson book skips over a lot of scripture, but I've been reading it all. I'm on the first few chapters of Deuteronomy. Scripture reading is time-consuming, and my priority is there and preparing Sunday school lessons (plus life, in general). Blogging about it takes a back-burner. But, oh, I have so much to say. I may (but probably won't) go back in more detail and ponderings, but for now, I'll just mention what stands out in my head.

Joseph Sold Into Slavery (Genesis 37 - 45)

This was a beautiful story. Hollywood couldn't have written it better. I was curious why Joseph was hated by his other brothers. I went back and reread and realized that Joseph was the first born of Jacob's beloved Rachel (I mention her a bit at the end of my last post).

Jacob (Error: I previously wrote Joseph. Pardon me. Jacob is Joseph's father) had four wives, but only loved and wanted one of them, Rachel. He had to marry Leah, her older sister, first in order to marry Rachel. Leah and Rachel each had hand maids that Jacob I guess had to marry, too. He hated Leah but managed to have several children with her. Rachel seemed to be barren, but after many, many years, she bore Joseph. She later had Benjamin, but she died during childbirth. So, Joseph and Ben had very special places in Jacob's heart, and he played favoritism towards Joseph. The other brothers grew jealous. It didn't help, either, that Joseph told his brothers he had a dream that they would one day bow down to him.

Anyway, it's a great story, easy to follow, great moral message, and a happy ending (Joseph's bondage allowed him to eventually put him in a place of power and help his family through a famine. He had a great attitude through all of his trials and stayed faithful. He readily forgave his brothers even before they asked for it).

Jacob had 12 sons (12 tribes of Israel) and one daughter, Dinah. For ultimate date-rape revenge, read Genesis 34.

Exodus, Numbers

Entertaining reading. Interesting stories. Testimony challenging.

(I'll expound on that later).

Jerkob and Esau

Genesis 24-29 Birthright Blessings; Marriage in the Covenant

Abraham arranges a marriage for his son Isaac. Rebekah, Isaac's cousin and member of the covenant, is chosen. Rebekah has twins: Esau (first-born, who Isaac favors) and Jacob (who Rebekah favors). While pregnant, Rebekah has a revelation that the elder child shall serve the younger (unusual in ancient times).

My first read-through gave me the impression that Jacob was a jerk and momma's boy. Rebekah and Jacob are deceptive, dishonest and manipulative. Yet, rewarded.

+Esau sells his birthright to Jacob: Genesis 25:20-34

Esau is a "cunning" hunter. Jacob is more of a home-body. Jacob has just made some "pottage" when Esau came in from the field, and he was "faint." Esau politely asked for some food. Jacob doesn't share and instead tells Esau to sell him his birthright first. Esau feels he's at the "point to die," and what good is a birthright if he's dead anyway (that's how I read it the first time around, the quote is "...and what profit shall this birthright do to me?" :32). Jacob made starving-Esau swear away his birthright if he wants any food. Esau gave away his birthright, ate, and went on his way.

I'm trying to keep this in perspective. The brothers are probably younger, and I bet younger brothers then gave each other as much hassle as modern brothers do today and throughout history. Do you think that maybe Jacob was just teasing Esau, and Esau was just exaggerating his hunger? Here's a modern twist to their conversation:

Esau: Oh, Dude! You have food! Man, I'm STARVING! The hunt was a bust, and I'm wiped. Can I have some?

Jacob: (Waving a bowl of food in front of Esau). Ahh, not so fast! What'll you give me for it?

Esau: Bro! Come on, I'm diein' here.

Jacob: Hmmm (with mischievous grin). I'll give you this if you give me your birthright.

Esau: You're wack, Dude!

Jacob: Swear!

Esau: Yeah, yeah, I swear, whatever, just give it to me, Dipweed.

Extortion at its best. Is it really binding? I guess it was. If Esau was patient, he would have been able to hunt something, being the great hunter he was. Would Jacob have had brotherly compassion and have fed Esau even if he didn't give up his birthright? Maybe there are just some sacred things you don't joke about. [The church manual interprets Esau's hunger as temporary.]

+ Rebekah and Jacob deceives Isaac. Gen. 27

Isaac is near blind. He asks Esau to hunt and prepare venison before giving Esau his blessing. Rebekah overhears this and makes a plan to disguise Jacob as Esau, prepare savory lamb, and have Isaac believe Jacob is Esau and inadvertently give Jacob Esau's blessing. Obedient Esau returns with his father's favorite dish only to discover he's been cheated out of his blessing.

(I really have no good spin on this, yet. No silver lining. I feel bad for Esau. I wouldn't blame him for rebelling and forsaking anything his parents teach him).

+ Esau marries outside the covenant Gen. 28:6-9

Oh, look, he does rebel. He overhears Isaac telling Jacob not to marry the daughters of Canaan (outside of covenant). Jilted, deceived, hurt, angry Esau turns around and does just that, marries two Canaan women to displease his parents.

+ Jacob marries Leah and Rachel in the covenant, and through him the Abrahamic covenant continues. - Gen. 29

First, he's in love with Rachel. Laban, Rachel's father, tells Jacob he can marry Rachel if Jacob works for him for 7 years first (29:18). After 7 years, Jacob is ready for his bride, Rachel, but Laban brings Leah, Rachel's older sister, for him to wed (29:21-30). Jacob feels tricked (Haha! How does that feel, Jacob?!). Essentially, the older needs to be wed before the younger. Jacob marries both but has to work another 7 years. Gen. 29:31 says Jacob hated Leah. He must not have hated her too much; they had 6 sons and a daughter together. I feel so sad for Leah's predicament (to not feel loved as other verses say).

The happy ending is that Jacob and Esau are reunited and make up (Gen. 33). That's about as far as I've gotten. I've skimmed ahead for my next lesson and see that Jacob continues his parents' dysfunctional behavior by having a "favorite child," Joseph. Nothing good could come from that.

Abraham To Sacrifice Isaac

This has been quite a journey for me preparing for today's lesson. I love this calling as it pushes me to explore things that I'd rather pretend didn't exist. I have to push aside what I thought I understood and be open to working towards a new understanding.

I was excited to give the lesson today. The kids (14-15 yr olds) were great and seemed to get as into it as I did. I asked them if they thought it was cruel for God to use Isaac to test Abraham especially when God already knew Isaac would be faithful. They all had answers. I asked how they thought Isaac was feeling. Would they be able to sacrifice something they loved dearly?

During this week's preparation, this is what I learned and then discussed with the kids:

How we perceive sacrifice today is different than in ancient times. We sacrifice time and money plus other things. Ancient culture was used to live-animal sacrifice, and some cultures used human sacrifices. Although Abraham and his culture didn't do human sacrifices, it wasn't unheard of with cultures around him. They were conditioned to the concept of it.

Abraham had great faith. Okay, I knew that, but this next scripture quote really sent it home for me:

Hebrews Chapter 11:

17 By faith Abraham, when he was tried, offered up Isaac; and he that had received the promises offered up his only begotten son,

18 Of whom it was said, That in Isaac shall they seed be called:

19 Accounting that God was able to raise him up, even from the dead; from whence also he received him in a figure.

So, how I understand this scripture (and the Abrahamic Covenent) is Abraham thinks, "Okay, God, you promised me I would have many seed through Isaac. I trust you. I know you are able to raise him from the dead to fulfill that promise if needs be."

Wouldn't that faith be comforting? Do you think if Abraham was comforted, then Isaac would also trust? I wonder what Abraham said to Isaac to keep him calm (scriptures don't indicate a struggle to be bound, Gen. 22:1-13). I wonder if he told him everything would be okay, and he would live one day to have many offspring. I imagine Abraham was a good father to Isaac, and Isaac trusted him as Abraham trusted God.

God knew Abraham would be faithful, but Abraham had to learn that about himself. This faith was also an example to Isaac.

Abraham was willing to sacrifice his precious son as our Father in Heaven was willing to sacrifice His.

I've come to peace with this story. I still don't understand why Sarah gave Abraham to Hagar (other than it was customary to have concubines when wives were barren). Was she impatient to have a child? Did she not have faith? I thought it was sad to send off Ishmael away from his father. It wasn't his fault that Abraham conceived him with Hagar. I'll have to save that for another time.

Cultural Differences

Here's just some follow-up comments to my last post where I am unsettled about the incest in Genesis. I asked if God would endorse incest.

I was reading an Ensign article, "Christ & Culture in the Old Testament." These sentences stood out to me:

"As we approach a study of the Old Testament, many of us may have to overcome conditioning that leads us to look at this rich volume of scripture through the lens of our own culture. Otherwise, imposing modern cultural understandings on a society that existed thousands of years ago will make the Old Testament seem strange or out of touch...We cannot appreciate and understand the Bible if we remove it from its own context and place it in our modern culture. Rather, we have to change our mind-set to better understand the ancient way of life."

My modern mind equates incest with abuse. That probably wasn't the case back then. Incest was the culture in ancient times. Partakers may not have felt at odds with it. Maybe it was necessary due to lack of suitable partners.

I don't like when some people today use the scriptures as an excuse to abuse others, i.e. it's in the Bible, therefore it must be okay. (Yeah, I have issues).

Anyway, this insight on cultural differences is helping me prepare for Sunday's lesson about Abraham obeying God's command to sacrifice Isaac. I initially imagined it through Isaac's eyes and how terrified he must have been, his father is about to kill him because God told him to. One: I thought it was a cruel thing for God to do to a child, and Two: how many quacks in modern history try to pull off a crime by saying God told him to do it?

Maybe Isaac wasn't terrified. Maybe he was honored and had complete, sweet trust in his father just as Abraham had trust in his Heavenly Father. Sacrifice was the norm in ancient history. Most were animal sacrifices, but there were parallel societies that offered human sacrifices, so it wasn't unheard of. Abraham, himself, was almost sacrificed as a lad.

I'm trying to understand, I really am.